REVIEW: Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

Because tonight’s review is a crayon-inspired ice cream, it’s only appropriate that I tell this one mostly through pictures. I will try to keep words to a minimum. Introducing Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream!

Friendly's Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

I had been searching for Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream for months, but when I finally located it… I was nearly an hour from home. So I did what any normal person would do; I stuffed a bag full of snow from the ground, tucked it away, and drove 100 mph on a 65.

Friendly's Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

I really didn’t want this ice cream to melt, for I had a vision… a plan.

The snow worked!

Friendly's Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream tastes like shitty vanilla ice cream. If Friendly’s wanted to impress me, flavor the damn stuff like crayons. But I didn’t buy Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream to eat it – no, no. I had something else in mind.

Friendly's Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

Using only three colors of vanilla ice cream, could I successfully color this picture of a teddy bear going down a slide? You might be asking yourself, “Junk Male… why were you so concerned with the ice cream melting if your plan was to melt it into a coloring book anyway?” So that the colors wouldn’t bleed, ya dumbass.

Friendly's Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

I chose this picture because the color palette in Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream largely matched what I needed. Blue for the sky, green for the grass, yellow for the sun, and then God knows what else. Things complicated in a hurry.

IMG_0580

There goes his eyes…

I ran into all sorts of problems. For instance, what color should I make the slide, since it bordered the blue sky, the green grass, and the yellow teddy bear? I couldn’t really mix any of the colors to create a new one, since two of the colors in Friendly’s Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream mix to create the third color. The ice cream was melting quickly, and I was covered in it.

The biggest obstacle was how to retain the detail of the bear’s facial features now that the ice cream was melting and spreading recklessly. Without a face, he was just an amorphous blob. Growing bored, I employed the help of one Oreo and one M&M and called it a day.

Friendly's Crayola Color Me Vanilla Ice Cream

Nailed it.

Blue Ice Cream Rating: Vanilla out of 10
Green Ice Cream Rating: Vanilla out of 10
Yellow Ice Cream Rating: Vanilla out of 10
Overall Rating: 4 out of 10

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2 Responses

  1. ZinThePhoenix says:

    The things we do for art…

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