REVIEW: Even Thinner Wheat Thins

LOL.

Even Thinner Wheat Thins

Even Thinner Wheat Thins

Where do I even begin with these Even Thinner Wheat Thins? Can crackers be self-conscious about their body image, too? I know people all across the nation are desperately clinging to their New Year’s Resolutions to lose some of the holiday weight, but COME ON! Wheat Thins are already so thin! Even Thinner Wheat Thins have to be a joke product, right? LOL. 

Even Thinner Wheat ThinsEven Thinner Wheat Thins

Does anybody even care about these Even Thinner Wheat Thins? I know Nabisco had lots of success with last year’s Oreo Thins, but people get excited about any kind of new Oreos. Oreo Thins were marketed as a more “sophisticated” snacking option than the regular Oreo. But Wheat Thins? They were already pretty sophisticated. And fairly healthy. And very thin. WHY ARE THESE LIMITED EDITION?

Even Thinner Wheat Thins

Here’s your review of Even Thinner Wheat Thins: they’re even thinner Wheat Thins. You can eat more Even Thinner Wheat Thins than normal Wheat Thins because they’re even thinner than the already-thin Wheat Thin. To be exact, you can eat 22 Even Thinner Wheat Thins per 140 calorie serving. With normal Wheat Thins, you can only eat 16 crackers. Now I have to admit – that is a slight advantage for someone like me who looks for every opportunity to exercise his chewing muscles. It’s always bulking season for that muscle group, after all. Anyone who tracks their calories and portions might appreciate this product in theory, but we’re only talking about 6 more crackers here… and they’re so thin that you won’t get that much extra mileage out of them. Who green-lighted this? An even thinner marketing group – that’s who.

Even Thinner Wheat Thins are made with whole grains. They taste exactly like Wheat Thins. I’ll be back on Monday with something more interesting.

They’re Just Thinner Wheat Thins Rating: 10 out of 10
How Sorry I Am You Read All of This Rating: 10 out of 10
Overall Rating: Who Cares out of 10

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