REVIEW: Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins

The salted caramel craze has reached everything from cupcakes to beer to Pringles. What the hell took it so long to hit breakfast?

Thomas' Salted Caramel English Muffins

Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins

Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins are the first mainstream, mass-produced salted caramel breakfast product that I can think of. Caramel was always considered delicious, but somewhere around 2008 the country at large discovered that salting the caramel was the way to go. Salted caramel is a sweet & salty wet dream, as a little sprinkling of salt excites the taste buds and enhances whatever flavor is already present. It began with logical products like Haagen Dazs ice cream and Starbucks beverages, but has since spiraled out of control and infected most everything, to include raisins. Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins are the latest victim.

Though I have to admit, I’m a little surprised the salted caramel trend has hit bread before it hit Oreos.

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I’m glad the same people responsible for the near-perfect Maple French Toast English Muffins are responsible for the first salted caramel breakfast I can pop into my toaster. They’ve earned the right to be bold and take chances. Unfortunately, I’m incredibly disappointed that Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins don’t pack the same punch that the MFT and Banana Bread predecessors did.

In a nutshell, Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins taste like English muffins that merely hint at caramel, and not one that’s very salted. The scent is floury and doughy more than anything, with only the faintest tinge of sweetness that could just as easily be a touch of maple syrup instead of caramel. There are tiny little pockets of something that almost looks like caramel, but it’s not actually caramel. It couldn’t be, since butter isn’t an ingredient here. Neither is “caramel,” unless you count “caramel color.”

Thomas' Salted Caramel English Muffins

Before I applied any spreadables, I took a bite of Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins right out of the toaster. Unimpressive. The most positive aspect is that none of the flavor that’s present worsens the product. I guess caramel bread could be off-putting to some, but fear not. What we have before us is an issue of not having enough flavor to get excited about. Salted caramel is such a powerful flavor. This lacks power. There’s a mild burnt and browned sugar flavor, but that’s about it.

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Holy shit, does butter help though. This shouldn’t come as a surprise seeing as how caramel is mostly butter, but Thomas’ Salted Caramel English Muffins finally tasted like caramel once I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter was applied. I Can’t Believe It’s Not Salted Enough, but at least the caramel flavor emerges admirably. This effect is muted as the butter is absorbed by all the nooks and crannies, so I still can’t get too excited about these.

In summary, where’s the Salted Caramel Pop Tarts?

How Much I Want Salted Caramel Pop Tarts Rating: 9 out of 10
Sweet & Salty Wet Dreams Rating
: I’m Not Sure out of 10
Overall Rating: 6 out of 10

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