On occasion, I’ll prepare a review of an item that gets completely lost in the shuffle. Products that I deem more exciting get released at a furious pace, and those items get priority in publishing. This item should still be available in stores; the review is just really, really late. You probably don’t care anymore. Enjoy!

Planters Chocolate Peanut Butter Brownie Mix

Way back in October 2015, I blogged about a bunch of nuts that nobody cared about.

Those nuts were Planters Turtle Sundae Mix, Planters Oatmeal Raisin Cookie Mix, and Planters Banana Sundae Mix. According to our site statistics, nobody read it and everybody thought I was stupid. One person commented on the review, but I think she just felt bad. All three of the nut mixes sounded like they had major potential, but only Oatmeal Raisin Cookie was good. The rest were flops.

The newest addition to the line is something I think everybody will care about: chocolate, peanut butter, and brownies!

Planters Chocolate Peanut Butter Brownie Mix


Introducing Planters Chocolate Peanut Butter Brownie Mix. Chocolate, peanut Butter, and brownies are all things I care about more than my personal well-being. Put them all together, and I care about them more than my unborn children.

I eat a fair amount of peanuts for healthy fats, but tonight I’m going to eat Planters Chocolate Peanut Butter Brownie Mix for unhealthy fats. Make no mistake about it – this is just candy in a bag. If you plan to climb a mountain and fuel up on this as trail mix, you will be 20 pounds heavier and rolling back down to the bottom in no time.

Let’s meet our unhealthy fats!

Planters Chocolate Peanut Butter Brownie Mix

Planters Chocolate Peanut Butter Brownie Mix, from left to right:

Peanut Butter Candy Covered Peanuts: The operative word here is “candy,” because authentic peanut butter this is not. The peanut butter candy coating can be peeled off like a sausage casing and it’s weird. It chews rubbery and only had mild, insincere peanut butter flavor. I was hoping these would be more like Skippy P.B. Bites. The inner peanut does most of the legwork here, making these taste a little more like real food at least.

Cocoa Peanuts: Planters sells these Cocoa-dusted Peanuts on their own they’re quite tasty. The cocoa flavor is amped up by a nice sprinkling of sugar. It’s a fine sweet & salty addition to the mix. The main drawback is that these peanuts lose some of their cocoa dusting as they get tossed around in the bag. Then it’s going to bounce off the waxy coating on 60% of the bag’s components and settle on the bottom. Pro: You can drink it at the end.

Milk Chocolate Covered Brownie Flavored Bits: These are the stars of the Planters Chocolate Peanut Butter Brownie Mix. The bits are milky and creamy but with a deeper, more fudge-y flavor. A perfect brownie approximation? Far from it, you dumbass, but they’re tasty regardless. They chew like Raisinettes but without the stupid raisin in the middle.

Peanuts: They’re peanuts.

Peanut Butter Candy Bits: That description fails to mention the chocolate coating here. These are like slightly worse Reese’s Pieces. They’re a fair combination of both chocolate and peanut butter favoring the PB slightly. They somehow manage to taste more like real peanut butter than the peanut butter candy covered peanuts.

Eaten Altogether: Yeah sure, it’s fine. It’s really just two flavors, chocolate and peanut butter, that aren’t of the finest quality. No real wow factor but it did have a pleasant blend of crunchy and chewy textures. The chewiness of the brownie-flavored and chocolate peanut butter bits helps you think “brownie” as you work through the mix.

Kind of…

Oh my God why didn’t I just buy a brownie?

How Much Anyone Cares About This Blog Rating: 0 out of 10
How Hard It Is To Climb Mountains When You Look Like a Boulder Rating
: 10 out of 10
Overall Rating: 6.5 out of 10

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2 Responses

  1. Hallie says:

    You didn’t make an IG post about this.
    I have been waiting.
    I care.

    – PS: I like your take on Raisinettes

    • Junk Male says:

      Maybe I underestimated the market for year-old peanut reviews. Or maybe you are just as weird as I am. Either way, never change Hallie. #DownWithRaisins