Hey friends! This is Drunk Female, the lazy friend of Junk Male. Every now and then I resurface in a half-hearted attempt to eat some candy and write about it. (I say “half-hearted” not because I don’t care, but because 50% of my arteries are completely clogged with popcorn butter.) Anyway, I’m back and I’m ready to banter!
In the great debate of “Chocolate vs. Vanilla”, I’ve always been firmly in the vanilla camp. Don’t get me wrong, I’m right there with the other crazies at 7am on February 15th to buy up all the half-priced Valentine’s Day boxes of chocolate. But vanilla is just so…. classy. If chocolate is Steve Urkel, then vanilla is Stefan Urquelle. (Am I dating myself with that reference? Is there a more modern example of this dichotomy? Oh well.)
Anyway, I was pumped to review these Vanilla Cupcake M&M’s.
Their last attempt at cake-flavored anything didn’t go so well; White Cheesecake M&M’s tasted like butter-flavored barf. But vanilla cupcake? This is squarely in Mars’ wheelhouse, since almost all of their white chocolate candies taste like vanilla anyway.
Vanilla Cupcake M&M’s have an Easter theme, because nothing says “Jesus is back from the dead” like vanilla cupcakes. Really though, other than the pastel colors of the candies, there is literally nothing about vanilla cupcakes that remind me of Easter. Maybe it’s a tradition for some families to cram cupcakes into plastic eggs and then hide them around the house?
The colors are awesome, though: they are nearly identical to the bright yet muted pastel of my old favorite Hershey eggs. According to the package there’s nothing in the center other than white chocolate, yet these are the delightfully fat M&Ms that are scientifically proven to be more fun to eat than the average-sized ones.
Good news for my fellow vanilla lovers: Vanilla Cupcake M&M’s are an excellent interpretation of vanilla cupcakes. There’s a bunch of sweetness up front, but this is much more than just flavored white chocolate. As the initial burst of vanilla frosting starts to melt away, there’s an undeniable butter yellow cake flavor that comes through. It elevates things from simply “vanilla” to distinctly “vanilla cupcake.” The light crunch of the coating adds a much appreciated texture change and cuts through some of the sweetness.
And make no mistake, these are definitely super sweet. I didn’t eat more than a handful, and that’s coming from a person who was asked never to return to the Cadbury Chocolate Factory when I vomited in the middle of the tour after eating too many Turkish Delights. However, they’re undeniably delicious and successful in achieving their advertised flavor. If you like vanilla cupcakes with buttercream frosting, these are for you. I could see these Vanilla Cupcake M&M’s being too much of one flavor for people who prefer milk/dark chocolate, but I personally love how clean and rich and dessert-y they are.
I recommend Vanilla Cupcake M&M’s to pretty much anyone: white chocolate fans, vanilla fans, and especially the three people who used to watch Family Matters and appreciated my Steve Urkel reference.
Vanilla Cupcake’s Relevance to Easter Rating: 1.5 out of 10
How Hot Stefan Urquelle Was Rating: 8 out of 10
Overall Rating: 8.5 out of 10
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