If I were a trail mix, which would I be?
Please understand that I use the words “trail mix” very liberally. Milka Oreo Choco-Mix is a pouch full of candy and cookies. It combines Oreo mini chocolate sandwich cookies (both regular and Golden), candy coated chocolate pieces, and chocolate candy buttons made with Milka chocolate. If a traditional trail mix is supposed to help you climb mountains and shit, this one is meant to help you roll down them.
You’ll have to understand that most of this review is a formality. Of course Milka Oreo Choco-Mix tastes good; Oreos are awesome and so is chocolate. The regular Oreos offer a balance of darker cocoa cookies and sweet vanilla crème, while the Golden Oreos offer a shortbread-like wafer. The candy coated chocolate pieces are just like M&M’s. They possess a near-identical candy shell but the milk chocolate contained within is creamier and more indulgent. You’ll be able to experience this full throttle with the included Milka chocolate discs. They melt effortlessly on your tongue and leave no question to the chocolate’s superior quality.
But I’m afraid it’s not all good news…
The sum is not greater than the parts with Milka Oreo Choco-Mix, and there are indeed flaws that limit its utility. Part of the appeal of the stand-up bag is taking this on the go and eating by the handful. But as I reached in, I kept getting mostly mini Oreos and the occasional chocolate disc. Most of the candy-coated chocolates sunk to the bottom instantly. The thin Milka discs, though there are a shit-ton, also shimmy downward like a game of Fat Plinko (let’s assume Drew Carey never lost all that weight). What’s worse, some of the Oreos unhinged themselves and I got handfuls of Oreo cookies crumbles and sometimes just discs of separated cream by themselves.
These problems with Milka Oreo Choco-Mix are negated by pouring the entire bag into a shallow bowl and cherry-picking to your heart’s desires. It’s particularly fun to sandwich the mini Oreos between the Milka chocolate discs to create a chocolate-covered Oreo experience. The main node is predictably chocolate, but it’s not entirely redundant as you get to experience various levels of sweetness with some golden vanilla cookies to break things up.
Nothing I say will stop you from buying this anyway, but THAT, dear friends, is how you analyze a trail mix.
Oreos on the Go Rating: 8 out of 10
Chocolate Plinko Rating: Hopefully 10,000 out of 10
Overall Rating: 7.5 out of 10
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