Before you open your mouth, just shut up.

I’ve seen sooo much hate for white chocolate in recent years. The criticisms often read that “white chocolate isn’t even chocolate”, which is technically a true statement by FDA standards (chocolate must contain a certain amount of cocoa solids, but white chocolate relies heavily on cocoa butter). I got news for you, folks: there is no ham in hamburgers, milkshakes are rarely shaken, and cheesecake isn’t actually a cake. All of them are delicious.

White chocolate is basically just sweetened fat, so remind me again what you’re complaining about? 🤔

So instead of being such a crochety old grump, just grab a Snickers. You’re not you when you’re hungry.

Snickers White

Snickers White

Despite these common criticisms, the white chocolate segment continues to grow. Yeah no shit were growing; I repeat again that it’s sweetened fat. But Mars in particular is no stranger to white chocolate varieties, having introduced Twix White and White Chocolate Peanut M&M’s just a while ago. Didn’t really care for the former, but I did quite enjoy the latter.

Snickers White is the company’s newest sweetened fat to throw its hat in the ring.

Snickers White

Other than the switch to white chocolate, there aren’t any other tricks to Snickers Sweet Fat. The peanuts, caramel, and nougat all return in the same ratio and configuration as the original.

This bar actually existed as a limited edition in several other countries in recent years, but there are often differences between the U.S. and foreign versions. I believe this is the first time that Mars has done Snickers White on U.S. soil.

Appropriately, it kinda looks like a stick of butter.

Instantly I’m impressed that the white chocolate doesn’t have such a strong flavor in Snackers Fat Shit to overshadow the peanuts, because I got a mouthful of nuts right away. Some white chocolates are off-putting to me if it’s doctored up with extra vanilla (or vanillin), but here it is subtle and seamless. It combines well with and compliments the nougat.

It’s sort of like a sweeter version of those soft Italian not & nougat candies (Torrone), where the white chocolate coating and caramel are providing the extra elements of sweetness. The peanuts, caramel, and nougat provide a large degree of the same Snickers flavor you know and love, and honestly I’m really digging the white remix. It shines a new light on the inner components.

Snickers White provides a new solution to the famous question: “Hungry? Why wait?”

Answer: Grab some butter, you Fatass.

BuT It’S NoT EvEn ChOcOlaTe Rating: 9 out of 10
How Much My New Nickname is “Sweet Fat” Rating: 10 out of 10
Overall Rating: 8 out of 10

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2 Responses

  1. Jennifer says:

    Oooh.. I love white chocolate, I’m definitely going to keep an eye out for this when I’m grocery shopping!

  2. hustlekitten says:

    I don’t really care for Snickers (like peanut butter but not a fan of peanuts) so I’m mostly here for your snark today. And I am FEELIN’ it here. Haha. Especially digging the call out for white chocolate naysayers.

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