REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Empowermint Ice Cream
I will admit freely that politics is not my thing. I’m not here to discuss it nor are you here to read about it. The kind of elections I get...
Junk Banter
NEWS: Red Velvet Chips Ahoy! Dropping Soon; Our Body Weights Are Not
Because I’m a magnificent diet destroyer, here’s the first look at some Red Velvet Chips Ahoy! cookies hitting stores soon: Red Velvet Chips Ahoy! Cookie should have been released three months...
REVIEW: Skittles America Mix
Quick – name the most American berries you can think of! If you said “the Chinese yumberry,” you must have worked for the Wrigley Company and held a significant position of power...
REVIEW: Keebler Fudge Stripes Birthday Cake Cookies
Ernest J. Keebler, the ringleader of the Keebler Elves, was conceived in the year 1968. He was born as a 75-year-old dwarf-boy where he has remained for eternity. Even Keebler...
REVIEW: Haagen-Dazs Brownies à la Mode
We’ve been treated to a lot of fun ice creams lately. The flavors seem to get more and more Junk Banter-y by the minute. One of the best features of ice cream...
REVIEW: D’s Naturals Fluffbutter (Every Damn One)
I sure hope whoever said peanut butter contains “healthy” fats was right, because tonight I’m going to feast on a lot of fat: D’s Natural Fluffbutter is one of several protein-infused...
REVIEW: Marshmallow Fruity Pebbles
Welp, since we don’t have a release date on the Fruity Crisp Oreos yet, I guess I’m just going to have to eat a bowl of Marshmallow Fruity Pebbles every...
NEWS: Fruity Crisp Oreos Are Coming; Oops I Crapped My Pants.
In what is undoubtedly the most important information you will read today, Nabisco Fruity Crisp Oreos will be hitting shelves at some point in the not-too-distant future! Feast your eyes on...
Kellogg’s Frosted A&W Root Beer Pop Tarts
My first glass of soda in like twenty years was a Pop Tart, and it was an unmitigated disaster. The Kellogg’s Frosted Orange Crush Pop Tarts were brutally terrible. But...
REVIEW: Kellogg’s Frosted Crush Orange Pop Tarts
Every man has his rules. One of mine is that I will not drink soda. Too much sugar. However, I also have this terrific rule that I must eat every...
REVIEW: Little Debbie Zebra Plus Nutty Bars
A math lesson, by Junk Banter: Zebra Plus Nutty Bars = One Fat Food-Blogging Idiot Ready To Eat More Garbage. I ate a lot of Nutty Bars in elementary school. They...
REVIEW: OhYeah! ONE Chocolate Birthday Cake
If you’ve been following my expeditious descent into obesity, you’re aware that I consumed OhYeah! ONE Birthday Cake bars for about 3 months straight to pretend I still had a...
