It wasn’t until I sat down to write this review that I really had to ask myself: “What the Hell is Cool Whip?”

By “ask myself” I of course mean “ask Wikipedia”, who describes it simply as imitation whipped cream.

Well if Cool Whip can pretend to be whipped cream, I see no reason I can’t pretend it’s my birthday.

Cool Whip Mix-Ins Birthday Cake

Cool Whip Mix-Ins Birthday Cake

Happy Birthday to me and to ALL OF US with brand new Cool Whip Mix-Ins Birthday Cake. ?

Cool Whip Mix-Ins Birthday Cake follows last year’s introduction of Cool Whip Mix-Ins Oreo and Cool Whip Mix-Ins Double Chocolate Brownie and represents the latest and greatest in imitation technology.

So what does my birthday party look like tonight? Me, my dog, and according to the ingredient list (the guest list, we’ll call it): water, hydrogenated vegetable oil, high fructose corn syrup, and sprinkles. 

A picture of one of my friends celebrating my birthday 🙂

While there are no cake pieces in Cool Whip Mix-Ins Birthday Cake, Kraft Heinz did a remarkable job emulating a buttercream flavor! Without being too sweet, the Cool Whip has a very strong, creamy frosting flavor reminiscent of the stuff on any good birthday cake. It retains the signature texture of Cool Whip (thick, doesn’t really melt, is probably horrible for you in so many ways).

Tastes so good I may never celebrate my real birthday again!

(That’s my excuse for nobody coming to my parties)

The sprinkles don’t add any texture, because they melt and their colors run (as they should). But it does result in some pretty awesome looking Cool Whip.

I literally only ate this with a spoon, though I suspect it would be equally good on pound cake, fingers, a fork or a knife.

Burning Questions:

1. Why didn’t you buy a cake for this review? Because I spent all my money on the Cool Whip.
2. No party favors? I’m broke.
3. What’s it like to have no friends? You’re lookin’ at it.

Place of Purchase: Shop Rite

Rating: 8.5 out of 10

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