Using only the finest fruit from the sacred Pop-Tart tree, Kellogg’s has created an entire fruit salad worth of new Pop-Tarts:
Let’s face it: we all need to get ourselves back in shape after the All-You-Can-Eat Lockdown Buffet that was 2020. Exercise is great, but like the old saying goes: you can’t out-run a year’s worth of GrubHub in one week. The best way to make long-lasting changes to your diet? Add some fruit!
Look, it’s not MY fault that all the ripest fruit in the store happen to be Pop-Tarts. I’m just out here trying my damn best like the rest of us, and my local groceries are stocked to the brims with juicy new fruit-filled Pop-Tarts. Lemons, bananas, peaches, mangoes… you name it. (That’s it, that’s all of them).
And sure, they’re flavored like dessert in a pastry that’s already dessert, but we all gotta start somewhere… GET OFF MY DAMN BACK!
Today’s review is part of a series. Today’s new fruit-flavored Pop-Tart is:
Kellogg’s Tropical Mango Pop-Tarts
The not-new, but ¡Nuevo! Tropical Mango Pop-Tarts are the first Pop-Tart to feature mango since 2008’s limited edition Guava Mango Pop-Tarts.
Unfortunately the Tropical Mango Pop-Tarts already start with 0-1 count because they’re not frosted. Well, it’s more like a foul ball instead of a full-on whiff job since they did drizzle some frosting on there, but everyone knows the best Pop-Tarts are covered in as much frosting as humanly possible. You really have to swing for the fences; I don’t understand why Kellogg’s stepped up to the plate with this weak-ass frost job.
Narrator: And it was in that moment he realized he was going to squeeze as many baseball references into this review as he could.
*Squeeze bunt.
As far as mango flavors go, they knocked it out of the park. Right off the bat, the flavor is instantly recognizable as mango and tastes as refreshing as a $12.00 Bud Light on a hot summer day at Dodger Stadium. It’s sweet, but not too sweet and doesn’t taste overly processed – an area where some Pop-Tarts swing and miss.
The lack of frosting was a bush league decision, but Kellogg’s otherwise kept their eye on the ball and delivered a fantastic filling that pairs really nicely with their pastry.
If I had to ballpark it, Tropical Mango Pop-Tarts are probably like the 6th or 7th best Pop-Tart you can buy right now.
Burning Questions:
- These baseball puns are pathetic. That’s one way to spin it!
- I’m still not gonna buy them because they’re unfrosted. Playin’ hardball, huh?!
- Stop it or I’ll literally cry. THERE’S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!
Place of Purchase: Shop Rite
Rating: 7.5 out of 10
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