“Go f*ck yourselves, Girl Scouts!”
Hey, back off. Oreo’s words… not mine.
Nabisco Caramel Coconut Oreos
Listen, guys… when you have to stretch 500 words about what a snack tastes like, you’re allowed to make shit up, like the Pillsbury Dough Boy is actually a girl, or that miniature food is actually zero calories, or that the Sour Patch Kids cereal was actually good. So when I tell you that Oreo and the Girls Scouts are currently engaged in a cage match for cookie supremacy, you just have to go with it.
I mean, Oreo is trying to MURDER them!! Last year when they created Mint Creme Fudge Covered Oreo Cookies, they effectively slammed the door on ever needing to talk to your coworkers or have kids of your own to score some Thin Mints. And now that they’ve already given the Scouts’ top-selling cookie the Stone Cold Stunner, it makes sense that they would target their second-best concoction: Samoas/Caramel deLites.
What a maneuver!!
You can put all the pictures of a Caramel Coconut Cake on the package you want… it’s crystal clear that the new Caramel Coconut Oreos are a chair shot to the skull of every little girl that has ever donned the Daisy uniform.
Caramel Coconut Oreos feature the chocolate wafer, a caramel coconut flavor creme, and coconut pieces inside the creme.
Oreo may have outsmarted the Scouts by simply leveraging flavors they already had to minimize work but still sell millions more cookies. They already have artificial flavoring on-hand for the Salted Caramel Oreo Thins and Coconut Oreo Thins, and I don’t see why they wouldn’t just combine ’em. All things told, that’s exactly what this creme tastes like.
Problem is, I don’t think they combine especially well. The caramel doesn’t really pack a punch as the coconut muscles past it, but neither shines especially well against the bitterness of the chocolate wafer. The coconut pieces add authenticity only in texture; this is still artificial through and through.
I’m neither offended by the Caramel Coconut Oreos nor am I impressed with them. But most importantly, they taste NOTHING like a Samoa and nowhere near as good.
Hey Oreo… you just got beat by a girl!
Burning Questions:
- What’s wrong with getting beat by a girl? They have weak arms!
- How would you know; have you ever even touched a girl? Totally!
- Are you making things up again? Gotta go!
Place of Purchase: Walmart
Rating: 5.5 out of 10
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