REVIEW: Little Debbie Eggnog Rolls
Eggnog is one of the most fattening things ever, so let’s cram it into a cake and eat it.Finally! Little Debbie Eggnog Cake Rolls take the most iconic flavor of the holiday season and repurposes it into something even more fattening. ‘Tis the season!
According to a study performed at Indiana University, over 135 million pounds of eggnog are consumed by Americans each year. It is a wonderful, gluttonous concussion consisting of egg yolks, milk, cream, sugar, and booze (if you’re doing it right). It’s quite possibly the biggest contributor to our holiday weight gain, seeing as how each of us consumes over 135 million pounds of eggnog each year.
Personally? I’m always at a dilemma with eggnog. I adore its one-of-a-kind flavor; make no mistake about that. But there are so many delicious things to eat that I try my damndest to avoid drinking my calories this time of year. Unless it’s beer. Or whiskey. Orrr spiked cider. Booze calories don’t ever, ever.
I’m just thrilled I can finally chew my eggnog, you guys.
Little Debbie Eggnog Cake Rolls use her tried-and-true formula last seen with Little Debbie Pumpkin Spice Rolls. You know what this cake tastes like by now – something between “pound” and “yellow” cake. It’s chewy and it’s not dry and it gets the job done. But success or failure will come down to the eggnog flavor within the cream.
And we have a winner! The cream inside Little Debbie Eggnog Cake Rolls tastes like eggnog! Imagine that?
You know how eggnog has, like, a shit-ton of cream in it? Well so do these cake rolls, and the result is something that makes a lot of sense. The cream is super whipped and fluffy with a slight spice to it. Not real spices, Heavens no. This is all artificial flavor but it tastes exactly like eggnog and I like it. The cake itself imparts something of a vanilla flavor that feels like it belongs squarely in the mix.
Like nearly all her products, Little Debbie Eggnog Cake Rolls are going to be too sweet for some. I totally get that. But there’s no denying that the creamy flavor profile contained within is reminiscent of the creamy beverage. I just wish it leaned a little more on spices like nutmeg and cinnamon instead of sugar. I also wish there was actual booze in it.
Pro Tip 1: These cake rolls feel much more at home if you freeze ’em and let the creme get cold.
Pro Tip 2: Dunk these in bourbon instead of milk and have yourself a Merry Little Christmas.
Drinking Your Calories Rating: 2 out of 10
Eating Anything and Everything Rating: 9 out of 10
Overall Rating: 8 out of 10
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