REVIEW: Pumpkin Pie Kit Kats
Break me off a piece of that pumpkin pie, Baby! ?
I’ve had a LOT of different flavors of Kit Kat in my lifetime. Junk Banter devotees, of which zero exist, will recall that I’ve got something of a Kit Kat fetish. I’ve spent no less than $150 importing weird-flavored Kit Kats from Japan, and once hosted a Japanese Kit Kat tasting party to celebrate. But never has a flavor screamed to me so much as these new (and American!) Pumpkin Pie Kit Kats, because I also have a second fetish: a dirty, insatiable pumpkin spice fetish that’s even greater than my Kit Kat fetish.
God Bless America, the land of weird fetishes.
Now, it’s entirely possible I’ve already eaten a Pumpkin Kit Kat before. I know the Japanese produce a Pumpkin Pudding Kit Kat, but I can’t read Japanese so it could have also been the Baked Sweet Potato, Creme Brûlée, or Red Bean Sandwich Kit Kats. It’s really impossible to tell with these Kit Kats.
I also got pretty drunk at that tasting party.
But there’s one thing I’m absolutely certain of: I’ve never had a Kit Kat this good before. Really, never! Pumpkin Pie Kit Kats are the best I’ve ever had. In any language.
First of all, the crisp wafers inside a Kit Kat are basically your graham cracker crust. Yeah the taste and texture are slightly different but with this absolutely stellar pumpkin pie creme confection, the differences are negligible. The candy coating also has its signature creaminess, and this creaminess is something you’d look for in your pumpkin pie filling AND the mountain of whipped cream you smother it in.
So what about the pumpkin spices?
A Kit Kat has never been named more accurately.
Cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger, and a touch of cloves – they’re all here to the maximum extent that flavored chocolate sticks can achieve them. Pumpkin Pie Kit Kats nail the artificial spice element so well that it even mellows the extra sweetness present in some Kit Kat flavors, making for a surprisingly balanced treat. I never chain-eat Kit Kats, but I’m staring at five empty wrappers and the night is still young.
I know there are gonna be a few people that default to the usual “these taste like a candle” argument. To those people I say… please send me your candles. I will gladly eat all of them. We must stop to appreciate the impressive work that Hershey’s has put forth here. They didn’t skimp on the pumpkin pie flavor, offering some intense pumpkin spice action while still retaining all of a Kit Kat’s distinguishing qualities.
Pumpkin Pie Kit Kats are, in the absence of a more perfect word to describe them, the perfect Kit Kat.
My Pumpkin Spice Fetish Rating: 1st out of 10
My Kit Kat Fetish Rating: 2nd out of 10
Overall Rating: 10 out of 10
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