I must admit: it’s a pretty tall order when you want to make a patriotic flavor of ice cream.
Ben & Jerry’s Red, White & Blueberry
Think about it… how many indulgent foods can you name that are red, outside of red velvet cake?
What about white? You’ve got vanilla, white chocolate, marshmallow… a little boring, but not so bad there.
Blue is a special kind of challenge: blueberries are about the only option, because cheese and corn don’t sound all that appetizing in ice cream.
If Ben & Jerry’s Red, White & Blueberry doesn’t sound exciting to you, maybe it’s time we look ourselves in the mirror.
And man, do we look AWFUL:
Ben & Jerry’s Red, White & Blueberry is blueberry & raspberry ice cream swirled with vanilla ice cream with strawberries & shortbread pieces. It sounds beautiful and #MURICA, but even before we get to the flavor, there are a few problems with the visual representation.
The blue is purple, the red hardly exists, and the cookies look like mold.
Perhaps it’s a metaphor; we are all disgusting train wrecks.
The flavors in Red, White & Blueberry don’t really fare much better. The light purple ice cream tastes only faintly of blueberries. It’s blended with raspberry ice cream, but the raspberry doesn’t make itself known at all. Overall it just doesn’t pack enough punch to be a feature flavor.
The vanilla ice cream is vanilla ice cream. Pairing it with the subtle fruitiness in the blueberry/raspberry blend improves it only slightly, amounting to a mild blueberries & cream flavor. There strawberries are unforgivably minimal in density, and if you do find a bigger chunk (I found one), they are too icy to appreciate.
The shortbread cookies taste okay, but God do I hate looking at them.
There’s not much silver lining here, as the vanilla ice cream may actually be the most enjoyable part to Red, White & Blueberry.
Much like most Americans, this Walmart-exclusive flavor is a hot mess.
Burning Questions:
- Wow, do you wanna tell us how you really feel? I just did.
- Why are the cookies blue? The blueberry concentrate.
- What “American” flavor would have been better? Red Velvet Marshmallow Cookie Monster.
Place of Purchase: Walmart
Rating: 3.5 out of 10
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