If you’ve been following my expeditious descent into obesity, you’re aware that I consumed OhYeah! ONE Birthday Cake bars for about 3 months straight to pretend I still had a handle on my health. If you took a piñata and stuffed it with sprinkles and cake frosting and then just beat the shit out of it, OhYeah! ONE Birthday Cake bars would come flying out. They’re one of – if not the – best protein bars on the market, and one of the finest interpretations of birthday cake ever condensed into a little sprinkle log
The OG
But birthday cake doesn’t just have to be vanilla, no no. Many of us prefer chocolate cake on our birthdays/on weekends/for breakfast every day. Given chocolate’s propensity to make most things better, I nearly fudged my pants when OhYeah! Nutrition announced the new OhYeah! ONE Chocolate Birthday Cake.
Now, I gotta be honest. Chocolate is my jam, sure. But I usually prefer my cakes with a golden/vanilla base and chocolate frosting or some other form of chocolate added to this base. Being that this one is all chocolate, I tempered my excitement and decided to only pre-order a few before I fully committed:
There’s 24 of them.
The OhYeah ONE! Chocolate Birthday Cake Bar is made with cocoa powder, confectioner’s sprinkles, and confectioner’s glaze. There are other ingredients, but who cares. Chocolate, sprinkles, and glaze. I think OhYeah!’s sprinkle technology has improved, because the OhYeah ONE! Chocolate Birthday Cake didn’t explode with sprinkles in quite the same way as the regular Birthday Cake. Opening the original was like winning Game 7 of the NBA Finals on your home court and being enveloped with confetti. The sprinkles hold together a bit better on this bar.
OhYeah! ONE Birthday Cake Bar
Wow. If the OhYeah! ONE Birthday Cake is a funfetti cake, the OhYeah! ONE Chocolate Birthday Cake is a Devil’s food cake. The bar has a rich cocoa flavor with vanilla undertones. The chocolate flavor is darker and more refined than direct competitors (like the ), but it’s also supremely creamy. The bar melts in your mouth as you chew it. It isn’t as sweet as chocolate frosting; it’s considerably less sweet than the OG version, in fact. But this isn’t just your typical chocolate protein bar… this is chocolate cake.
You know how Devil’s food cake is a bit fluffier than a standard chocolate cake recipe? That’s the best way to describe the texture of the OhYeah! ONE Chocolate Birthday Cake bar against its competition. The inside is so soft and airy and translates wonderfully for chocolate cake. The sprinkles just seal the deal. Sprinkles never add too much in the way of flavor, but they add just enough of the sugary candy vibe to be value-added. The texture is what I loved most about this bar, because it allowed me to eat it just as I would a slice of cake:
Frosted with a fork.
I often apply nut butters to my protein bars to make for a more substantial snack, so I couldn’t help but frost the shit out the OhYeah! ONE Chocolate Birthday Cake. It’s a really great canvas for protein nut butters, or cookie butters, or real frosting. Have at it. The texture is soft enough that I could use a fork to complete the experience with ease. This was immensely satisfying.
In summary, the OhYeah! ONE Chocolate Birthday Cake is one of my new best friends. It’s easily the best chocolate cake bar I’ve had yet. But is it better than the original OhYeah! ONE Birthday Cake Bar? Not quite; not for me. There are so many other chocolate-based competitors that offer something in the same vein. While the attention-to-detail here is a step above the rest, it’s not in a class of its own like the original. I don’t discriminate when it comes to cake, however, and this bar slots in at the second spot in the rotation.
Devil Dog With Protein Rating: 7.5 out of 10
How Much The Devil’s In the Details Rating: 9 out of 10
Overall Rating: 8.5 out of 10
Nutrition: 210 cals, 22g protein 25g carbs, 7g fat, 10g fiber (IMOs), 1g sugar; Contains sucralose.
Read Also: REVIEW: Oh Yeah! ONE Bars (All of Them)
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Reading this review reminded me that I never got around to trying the original ONE birthday cake bar, so I ordered a box on your recommendation, and I was blown away. It’s easily the best non-chocolate protein bar I’ve ever had, and sits only behind the Fit Crunch peanut butter and cookie dough (snack sizes, not full-size) as the best protein bar overall (only because of my affinity for chocolate). Damn good bar.
All that to say that your reviews actually do help some of us out here!
Might be my favorite comment yet, Sam. I’m thrilled you enjoyed them that much. I’ve said the Fit Crunch Peanut Butter is my favorite PB bar on the market, even if those things are straight candy bars. Downright delicious. The snack sizes are the way to go.
Thanks for reading and I hope to steer you right a lot more than wrong!
Right on, man. I found you via your ‘every Quest bar’ piece (I hope you drank 600 gallons of water with all those high-fiber bars), and yours is the best ‘junk food blog’ in this whole giant internet building, so I’ll be following along from now on.
I hope you’ll consider expanding your purview to include fast food at some point; I’d love to see how your mildly-sardonic style would wrap itself around all those high-quality burgers and such.
I’ve considered fast food, but truthfully I have no room left in my diet to go down that road. I may tackle on the most ridiculous of items that are released, however. Suggestion noted – you’re trying to kill me.
On a serious note, thanks again for the high praise on the site. Means a lot!