It’s hard to imagine, but it’s been well over two years since Nabisco released its popular Oreo Thins line (it’s been two and a half).
At the time, Nabisco was clear in their marketing to inform people that Oreo Thins were NOT “Diet Oreos.” The slimmed-down design wasn’t intended to make it easier to save calories; rather, it was meant to deliver an altogether new, more grown-up Oreo experience. Lighter and more delicate than the original, Oreo Thins were billed as “sophisticated” snacking.
What, then, shall we call these new Fudge Dipped Oreo Thins Bites? “Sophistication gone wild? ”
I guess Nabisco’s really, REALLY trying to prove they’re not diet food with three new varieties of fudge covered Oreo Thins Bites: Original, Mint Creme, and Coconut Creme.
Sure, they’ve shrunk them down even further, but enrobing cookies in chocolate is the exact opposite of sophistication. It’s more of that primal, savage life. I’ll compare it to pornography because… well, this is my brain, people:
– Oreo Thins are Skinemax.
– Fudged Dipped Oreo Thins Bites are the weird fetish stuff in the deepest, darkest corners of the Internet.
Having a hard time following me? Just enjoy the journey folks…
Oreo Thins Bites – Original
Each Oreo Thins Bite is the size of several quarters stacked upon one another, and the taste is predictably money.
While obviously second-rate to something like Milka, the chocolate coating in Oreo Thins Bites adds an extra element of deliciousness. The fudge tastes less “weird” than the coating in White Fudge Oreos, reminding me of an enhanced version of the fudge coating on Keebler Deluxe Grahams. It simply works better with an Oreo than it does a graham cracker.
The best part – the surprise in all of this – is the cookie’s softer texture. The creamy chocolate coating combines with the lighter wafer in such a way that it feels meltier – like you’ve already soaked it in milk. The taste reinforces the same sensation: more milk and more sugar make these taste like a dairy-drenched Oreo. These are quite good.
And I feel so thin!
Rating: 8.5 out of 10
Oreo Thins Bites – Mint
Everything above holds true with the Mint Creme Oreo Thins Bites, with an extra twist of Grasshopper flavor.
The execution is equally effective with the mint version, so this will come down to personal preference. The mint creme is smooth and strong enough to be appreciable despite the bigger chocolatey presence from the coating. If you get down with Mint Oreos and Mint Oreo Thins more than their classic Oreo counterparts, you’ll find that pattern repeated here. Go mint.
I will admit: the mint does make these taste more sophisticated, and I’ve never felt so thin in all my life!
Rating: 8.5 out of 10
Oreo Thins Bites – Coconut
The Coconut Creme Oreo Thins Bites intrigued me most, because the Coconut Oreo Thins left some of their promise on the table.
The biggest flaw with Coconut Oreo Thins was that the coconut creme didn’t play nice with the bitter cocoa wafer. Basically, they needed more sweetness to shine. I’m certainly no chemist, but something tells me that a chocolate jacket could help things along.
Just call me a chemist, because I was right! The milk chocolate exterior makes the coconut flavoring finish more smoothly and it ends up being more satisfying overall. The coconut is lightly sweet, crisp and refreshing. But having just tried the other two varieties, I still feel this is a tick behind. It tastes a little more artificial, as pretty much every coconut flavoring I’ve ever tried has a tinge of “suntan lotion” to it.
There’s one other thing I noticed: it’s like the pounds are shedding right off me!
Rating: 8 out of 10
In summary, these new “Oreo Thins Gone Wild” were a really good idea by Nabisco! Look for them at your local grocery, pharmacy, and freaky adult sex stores nationwide.
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