I feel I should open with an apology. Back in November, I instructed everyone to put on their pants and go searching for the just-released Oreo Churros. J&J Snack Foods Corporation, the manufacturer, had just announced their availability. Well, the people that read our blog (that one guy) wanted to kill me because nobody could find Oreo Churros anywhere.

Had I misspoken? Did my refusal to fact-check everything I publish finally get me in trouble?

The thing is – I knew Oreo Churros were out there because I saw them in people’s hands on Instagram. But trust me when I say that nobody felt your frustration more than I. Without exaggeration, about 10,000 extra miles on my car must be attributed to trips with the sole intent of locating Oreo Churros in these past two months. It is impossible for you to understand my fascination with tracking down and collecting hidden items like I’m some sort of Super Mario Brother. I would not accept defeat by Oreo Churros like they were some sort of Bowser.

And so, I e-mailed the manufacturer to get more information. Long story short, I had been searching for an item that hadn’t reached my market yet. But armed with a list of eventual retailers and some tentative timelines, I finally located my Oreo Churros at a Redner’s minutes from my house.

It’s important to remember that Oreo Churros are not a Nabisco product – again, they’re produced by J&J’s Snack Foods Corp. Who the heck is that, you ask? Quite honestly it doesn’t matter, because these are Oreo Churros.

But a fun fact – I just found out that J&J Snack Foods Corp. is the same company that released the Pillsbury Mini Pies that I absolutely loved when I discussed them here on the blog. My excitement just leveled-up like I’m some kind of Luigi (Ok I am definitely playing Super Mario 64 tonight).

These Oreo Churros need no further introduction – you’ve already ruined some underwear over them.

Diet starts tomorrow.

Your options for cooking Oreo Churros are baking, toasting, or frying. Frying them very well could be the straw that broke the fat food blogger’s back, so I opted for baking like most people will. Simple prepartion – preheat to 450, bake for 8 minutes, and roll in Oreo Crumb Sugar topping. It says that last step is optional, but c’mon now… you already bought Oreo Churros, and now is not the time to exercise discretion regulating your sugar intake.

Because I can’t wait 8 minutes without eating something, I’ve already dug into the Oreo sugar topping. It’s pretty much straight sugar blended with straight Oreo cookie crumbs. The sugar’s sweetness is slightly subdued by the bitter cocoa, and this cocoa does remind of the chocolate cookie wafer on the standard Oreo. Tasty!

I had to restrain myself from eating all of it before the churros were ready.

I’m truly amazed with how well these Oreo Churros hold up after heating in the oven. The creme has barely started to escape, but it never turns into a melty mess. I tried one Oreo Churro sans sugar just to see what I was working with, and I have to say… not as good as I had hoped. The cocoa in the churro dough tastes somewhat unrefined and, when heated, produces a burnt flavor… like a Chocolate Pop Tart that hung out in the toaster a bit too long. The creme in the center was a nice warm sensation, but its taste only vaguely reminded me of a vanilla Oreo creme. Pretty generic flavor and still not that sweet.

Oreo Churros have much better luck when engrossed in the Oreo cookies crumb sugar. Predictably, this brought the necessary sweetness to the table and I found the aggregate experience to be rather comforting and enjoyable. Some churros are too sweet, but the sugary sweetness here is balanced evenly by that chocolate dough. These are good; just not spectacular. The Oreo crumb sugar coating is a must for this product to take on a flavor worthy of the Oreo branding. To be honest, I think it does more justice to the Oreo than it does the churro. What’s missing here is that buttery, flaky, greasy indulgence that make churros my favorite snack at the carnival. These are kind of just doughy chocolate tubes; the texture is a little crispy but somehow a little rubbery. Perhaps Oreo Churros would benefit most from the frying preparation?

LOL what am I saying “perhaps?”

It looks the same; what do you want?

The grease, at the very least, makes these more fattening. I suppose the oil does help make for a slightly richer experience. But while the Oreos get a tad crispier through fying, they’re still the neat and tidy little chocolate tubes that don’t flake apart like a churro would. Stick with baking if you don’t want to burn yourself like I did during this review.

Bottom Line: Oreo Churros are a fun, appetizing dessert option whose preparation is a breeze. These bite-sized snacks would probably pair well with a significant other, a bottle of wine, and Netflix on a Saturday night. However, the flavor profile is relatively straightforward and not quite the innovative creation we all lost sleep over. With the expectations of some as high as they were, I kind of expected this. At the end of the day, I had no issues eating half the box and I’ll have no problem eating the other half for breakfast.

Odds You Ever Find Them Rating: 2 out of 10
Odds I Ever Get My Diet Back on Track Rating: 1.5 out of 10
Overall Rating: 6.5 out of 10