I have this theory as a food blogger. Well, it’s not really a “theory” so much as it is fact, and I’m not really a “food blogger” so much as I am “an idiot with a website.” But the fact is this…

Nobody cares about Triscuits.

I’ve learned this fact on multiple occasions. Nabisco launches new flavors of Triscuits fairly often, so I share them to my social media pages to spread the word. One time I posted about Sriracha Triscuits and lost ten followers on Instagram. Ten people that used to like the material I provided were so disgusted or disinterested that they severed ties with me completely.

If anything is going to make people care about Triscuits again, it’s Nabisco Pumpkin & Spice Triscuit.

Nabisco Pumpkin & Spice Triscuit

Except I’m here to tell you that you shouldn’t care about Nabisco Pumpkin & Spice Triscuit. Because they are just ok – like every other Triscuit.

I got a promising whiff of pumpkin spice when I opened the box. Mostly cinnamon, but good enough for the smell test. Then I tried one and tasted no spice at all. Just wheat with a tiny bit of extra sweetness that fled soon thereafter.

Pumpkin & Spice Triscuits use pumpkin powder in the recipe. Too bad pumpkin doesn’t have much taste on its own. Nabisco completely forgot the “& Spice,” and the product is boring as a result.

Anyway, whatever. The real reason I bought Nabisco Pumpkin & Spice Triscuit was to add various toppings to the crackers. That’s how you’re supposed to eat Triscuits, after all. I assembled a great list of pumpkin items to place atop my pumpkin Triscuits.

w/ Pumpkin Spice Gouda Cheese

I saved this cheese for three weeks to do this, and it wasn’t very gouda. That’s not me being punny; it didn’t taste like gouda. Or pumpkin spice. Meh.

w/ Hostess Pumpkin Spice Cupcake

Much better. The Hostess Pumpkin Spice Cupcake reminded me that everything is significantly better than Triscuits.

w/ Ben & Jerry’s Pumpkin Cheesecake

Things escalated in a hurry. This Triscuit with Ben & Jerry’s Pumpkin Cheesecake ice cream was very cold and hurt my teeth a little.

w/ Pillsbury Grands! Pumpkin Spice Rolls

I’m gonna go lay down now.

Pumpkin Rating: 2 out of 10
& Spice Rating: 1 out of 10
Overall Rating: Who Cares out of 10

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