For nearly two years now, I’ve joked about eating Oreos for breakfast on this blog. Here’s the funny thing about jokes though: jokes are only jokes if they’re a) funny and b) not a straightforward truth.
When something is a plain fact, like the fact that I’m about to eat breakfast-flavored Oreos at 7:00 AM for breakfast, it cannot be a joke in the literal sense. Sure, my LIFE is a “joke,” but you already knew that and it’s not exactly funny so much as it is sad and difficult to watch.
Ladies and gentlemen… this is not a joke:
Nabisco Waffles & Syrup Oreos! Discounting the fact that nobody saw this one coming, this has got to be one of the most anticipated Oreo releases in history. Unlike Candy Corn, Peeps, and Swedish Fish, EVERYONE loves breakfast and especially high-carb ones like waffles.
Of course, execution remains the question. How exactly will Nabisco pull off “waffle” flavor? A recipe for waffle batter contains eggs, flour, sugar, and vanilla extract – the exact same stuff found in a standard cookie recipe. Don’t get all technical and come at me with a baking powder vs. baking soda argument because as far as I’m concerned, they’re both cleaning products that are absolutely nonessential to cooking. Have you ever eaten either of them straight up with a spoon? Tastes like horseshit.
Waffles & Syrup Oreos will probably not taste like horseshit but more like straight maple syrup and butter. No problems there – a stick of butter with a glass of syrup is not a foreign breakfast in the Banter household.
Waffles & Syrup Oreos use the regular Golden Oreo wafer and a two-tinged white & brown creme layer. They smell like fake syrup and fake butter, which I think is real nice.
I attacked the creme first and got the hint of maple syrup pretty quickly. Notice I only said hint; it’s definitely not as strong as the smell suggested it would be. Still, the maple flavor is present in enough quantity to separate itself from the normal vanilla creme.
My expectations of a buttery flavor were for nought. There’s traces of maple syrup and not much more.
Taking a full bite with the wafer was both an enjoyable experience and a gentle letdown. The wafers didn’t bolster the “waffle” angle at all – they just remind you hard that these are Golden Oreos through and through. The wafers are too sugary to translate accurately for a waffle. A buttery presence in the creme would have gone a LONG way here. If Waffle Crisp scores a 10 out of 10 on artificial waffle flavor, these cookies are like a 5 out of 10.
Still, the maple flavor in the creme pairs well with this cookie. It feels at home for the Golden Oreo formula -it’s slightly sweeter, and it’s a nuanced sweetness worth purchasing if you already like Golden Oreos. To that point, they remind me of the Candy Corn Oreos in that they taste great despite not tasting quite like the featured flavor. At least in this case, Waffles & Syrup Oreos are more waffly than the Candy Corn Oreos were candy corny. You could say the flavor waffles between syrup and vanilla.
Welp, I’m all out of jokes. See you tomorrow.
How Funny My Jokes Are Rating: 1 out of 10
How Much My Life Is A Joke Rating: 9 out of 10
Overall Rating: 7 out of 10
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you’re life is not a joke i appreciate you hommie